Saturday, March 12, 2011

In retrospect...

I'll be 58 on March 14.  I don't consider myself to be a "senior citizen" but I'm guessing some younger folks are thinkin' that way about me...in much the same way I thought about "50 Something's" back in 1978.  While I don't "see" myself that way now, truth is, I can certainly see "that place" from here.

Life is so much shorter than I ever imagned it would be, and so much more than I ever dreamed it could be.  My cup isn't half-full, it overflows..
  • In High School a guy named Mark Zier walked into my life and lovingly led me to a life-changing decesion to trust Christ; then he introduced me to a girl who eventually became my for-life companion.
  • I have been blessed by that girl, Laura Cherrie, who became my wife (we were both 19), help-mate, mother of and for our children, my best friend and companion, for 38 years and counting!
  • Neither of my parents were college grads and when the time came for me to enroll, my father died; there was no money for higher education.  God provided, first at Duke were I received my BA and then at Talbot Seminary where I earned an M.Div. all without student loans.
  • God blessed us with two children.  Erin and Jospeh have made me so proud because of the people they have become; honest, engageing, generous, interesting good-hearted young adults...and two of my closest friends.
  • We have two grandsons.  Braden and Kellen make us laugh, give us hope for the future, love us in a special way unique to our role in their lives...and enjoy hanging-out with us.
  • I have enjoyed two modestly successful careers centered around helping people; for 25 years as their Pastor and, now, for the last 10, as guy that takes the "scarey" out of risk as their State Farm Agent.
  • Over the years I've witnessed lives change in long-term and very profound ways; I have played a part in that process as a tool in the Master's Hand; what a privilege those moments of been.
  • While I have experienced disappointment and betrayal in and from friends, my life has been rich beyond measure because of folks who've come alongside and embraced me (changed me) with their friendship.
  • I have traveled with people through the most difficult intersections of their lives, prayed with them and waited; then watched God do what only He can do..."exceeding, abundantly beyond anything we could ask or imagine."
  • Laura has loved me and patiently waited for me to become the man she needed and so richly deserves.
  • The roles (the work of my hands) I have chosen to invest my energy in, have been challenging and rewarding.  Not once have I felt trapped in doing what has been my life's work.  It's been and continues to be too much fun.
  • My girlfriend's dad, (my future father-in-law) stepped into my life as the man I needed when at age 17, my father died--he continues to be a rock for me.
  • Mentors have invested their lives in me.  They've taught me, listened to me, cried with me and believed in me. 
  • Life has softened me.  Tenderness comes easy today.
I enjoy a rich tapestry of memories, some good and not.  These memories confirm what most people eventually come to realize: there are a few regrets, there are scores upon scores of very special people and wonderful events, whose images remain clear to the smallest detail.  I smile me each time I think about these people and replay those special moments.  There has been failure, good fortune and difficulty; pain, lost dreams, heartbreak and victory.  But through it all runs a story, my story, of God's grace transforming me, using me, teaching me and most amazingly, loving me with an everlasting love.

When I die, I pray my legacy will be people I've touched saying, "I love Jesus more."

Praise God from whom all blessings flow.

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